Naked People on the Roof

So, we have this hot tub on the roof... its a glorious setting with an amazing view and purple twinkling lights all around. Needless to say it is incredibly romantic to be up there alone with your sweetheart; and, as a soon to be married female, I love romance. I love it when couples get engaged on the roof, I'm okay with people making out on the roof... but occasionally the romance goes too far for a semi-public hot tub. I feel that I should mention that the roof is heavily monitored, we have a motion sensor as well as cameras, so I know when people sneak up there at 4am, and I know what they are doing.

Tonight, being a Friday night in downtown Fargo, was crazy. My phone just kept ringing and ringing and ringing. One of those calls was from a group of twenty-somethings staying in one of our rooms, asking if they could use the hot tub. This was at 2am, and usually I would say no because there was obviously some drinking going on and the roof gets slippery, and being drunk in a hot tub is not always a great idea. But it was a group of people, and the person I talked to sounded sober enough to keep her friends from drowning. So I took the cover off the hot tub and let them have some fun. 3am rolls around and a couple of girls are wondering around the lobby in their bikinis, totally drunk. So I decided to put an end to the party. They all went back to their room nicely, without complaint, so I cleaned up after them and went on my way.

At 4am, I noticed that the elevator  was on the roof, so I check the cameras and what do I see. Two stark naked people. I've seen it before- like I said, the roof is very romantic. So I go up there and politely tell them that they need to return to their room. They are obviously embarrassed, and try to sell me on them going to the roof to smoke. First of all, that's illegal, my friends. Secondly... you were naked, I saw the lack of cigarettes. But it really wasn't that bad, we all laughed about it as we rode the elevator back down.

So, to all you hotel stayers out there, if you're staying at a nice hotel that costs more than $150 for a standard room, you can count on there being cameras everywhere. Please don't leave us workers a sticky mess to clean up, its not fun at all. Just don't do it.

As a side note, P!NK's managers are trying to book her a room here tomorrow night, but we are totally sold out for the concert. I'm really bummed that I wont get to meet her. I would totally let her do whatever she wants in the hot tub.

Drunk People Suck

By all means people, get drunk in the comfort of your own home, where you get to wake up the next day and see the chaos you have reeked. But in public, I think tipsy is where you should feel obligated to stop. Especially if, when drunk, you pee in trash cans with your pals. Seriously!? That has got to take the cake for being the most gross thing anyone has ever done in my lobby. To quote a great song from Kickass - I hate you. Please die. And the guy who fell asleep on the couch  in the lobby... I give you kudos for being able to sleep through all the noise from the party going on all around you, but making me call detox to drag your bum out of here, not cool. It took me forever to find their number. I tried to wake you myself, but man, you drunk! I dislike drunks sleeping in my lobby, but urinators, I hate you more.

Whose Hotel is it Anyway?

So I've been working at this amazing hotel for the last three months called the Hotel Donaldson, HoDo as the locals call it. And it never occurred to me until tonight that my job is actually pretty interesting. See, I work the overnight shift here, which consists of two hours of actual work, and six hours of sitting around waiting to go home, hoping that the person who comes in at 0600 is on time. But as I was valeting the car of a certain famous comedian, it hit me. My job is interesting. Sure, I do a lot of laundry, and I do mean a LOT of laundry. But I also deal with some very interesting characters, most of which are very drunk, no thanks to our award winning lounge downstairs. I will say, our martinis are pretty dang good. So, I am starting a blog, so that all you readers who stumble upon my words, have the opportunity to see exactly how ridiculous you might sound when you get hammered.